I don't know that I appreciated this book the first time I read it.  Recently I have been studying family culture and decided I needed to revisit this book.

When I was starting to homeschool, I was looking into so many things and ways to figure it all out.  I had not intended to homeschool.  It sorta just happened.  When I started raising a family, I did not think about family culture or what a good family culture would be.  I was too busy trying to get a list of things done that I thought needed doing.  I didn't set out to build a specific family culture...it just kind of happened.  I have to say this is one area that I am studying more now because I can see the affects of my family culture on me and those things that I tried to change in my family.  As I think about how to deliberately build a family culture, Understood Betsy becomes a classic for me in that it contrasts independence and dependence.   What do we want to teach in our homes and why?  Why is it so important to examine what we might or might not being doing in our homes?

I have to believe that Aunt Frances did the best she could with the knowledge that she had but as we see in the story it creates a lot of fear and feeling of helplessness with Elizabeth Ann (Betsy).  In many ways the transition that Betsy experienced when she moved to the farm is how I felt being introduced to the TJEd philosophy.  There was so much that I didn't understand or know how to do. I have never felt that I had a great education and have struggled with what that even looks like or means.  I just knew something was missing and I wanted different.  But I didn't know what that difference was.  I started to see how things could be different as I studied the ideas taught in the TJEd philosophy.   Today I have been spending more and more time liking about how to build a family culture that unites and heals people and communities.   

Interesting how as you better understand who you are and who you want to become, your classics change.  Books that you thought were only okay become books that you later can use to help you see yourself and the world around you better.   

After first reading this book I wondered how this book was different than The Odyssey in its main idea of what an 'ideal man' was.  I reviewed the Teaching Company recordings by J. Rufus Fears which state that a major theme for this book was in that we will all die (fate).   The book seems to focus on living as best you can and leave a legacy of greatness.

As I was re-reading this book I noticed how much the book talk about feuds.  Why do we feud so much?  Why do we seek revenge and not let things go?  Why is the warrior so much a focus in writings?  The Iliad is a long feud...and then a feud within a feud.  Why is this such a common theme?

The warrior is a common theme in our literature, sometimes just named differently through time.  I can think of many books along these lines:  Ender's game (Most of Orson Scott Card), L'Amour books, Sanderson books, Tolkien books, and many others.  We seem to still be grappling with this idea of what an ideal man is.  What makes a man a good warrior or hero?  Why?   Why is it so important for us to be remembered?  

One question posed by Prof Fears was "How will you handle trouble?  as a warrior with honor or with pride? "

I liked this question and have wondered how would I handle trouble?   Of course I don't know that I am facing a Grendel but maybe I am after all.  It just acts, looks, and smells different then the monster in this story.  What is the best way to handle the troubles we are facing?  Is it important to me to leave a legacy of greatness and what does that look like for me?